Saturday, July 01, 2006

The Unbearable Lightness

There is a weightlessness to this moment – like all my baggage is missing or lost or gone. The aches and pains and staleness of the past and the worries and anxieties of the future and the naked heaviness of the present – they are all gone. This weightlessness is funny because it is in relation to nothing that I’ve known in the past. It is as if I am simply a cluster of molecules that are experiencing the flow of energy within and through them. They are propelled up and down and back and forth and they acquiesce in perfect harmony with each such movement.

Even the weight of my thoughts is missing, it seems. Those that weigh so heavily on me drowning me in their potent yearning or dread. Even those light fluffy ones that are simply wispy whims or feathery fantasies – harmless at one level but with the deadly potency of creating an all consuming mental movie if left unchecked.

And as I experience this lightness I also sense a feeling of expansiveness. An awareness that this moment engulfs me but exhumes me as well. It shines a light, bright glow on the spirit behind the shadow, the essence under the persona. And that focus is perhaps what allows me to carry on my shoulders this new load.

This load of simple awareness – one that weighs nothing but contains everything